A Turning "Point"

So, the Vegan thing didn't work out. Suffice it to say, I didn't even last a whole day doing that.  Plus that whole thing with soy products and its effect on men kind of scared me off.  Well, that and the $60 I spent at Whole Foods for not as much food as you would think.  I don't even think it was a matter of lack of willpower.  I guess you can say I gave up a little too easily, but then again, it is kind of unrealistic to think that I could just give up animal products cold turkey (no pun intended) and what not.  I'm sorry, but I like meat and cheese too much...

So, I'll let the Vegans have that.

Anyways, today I went to my (fourth) first Weight Watchers meeting.  Ironically, the first time I did it seven years ago (has it been that long, already?) I was actually successful with it and was able to pretty much keep the weight off until freshman year of college.  Then the yo-yo-ing weight started after I gained my Freshman 15 and so on.  So I attempted to do it again twice during college, since it worked the first time, but it never worked out.  I just think life was a little too stressful to successfully do it at that time.  So, now that I'm in a place where I'm trying to regain control of my life, I figured I should include my body in that.  So here I am.  Spending a Saturday night looking up point values at different restaurants.

I actually have to say that I'm glad I can still eat at my favorite places, like Chick-Fil-A.  I'm glad that I can go in there and get a CFA Sandwich for 11 Points, and add a Coke Zero and a side of fruit for no additional points.  Or, I can go to McDonald's and order a 6-piece Chicken McNuggets Meal with sauce and substitute the fries for apple dippers with caramel, and of course, order a Diet Coke as my drink: all at the bargain Points usage of 9.  So, I can even go to fast food places and cut back.  To me, that's the true beauty of Weight Watchers.  It's realistic.  It knows that you're going to need to make that trip to the drive-thru every once in a while, and it's perfectly fine.  On WW, it's really all about making the right choices and exercising good portion control.  But if you're going out for dinner with your friends, it allows for it.  If you just can't pass up that occasional slice of Key Lime Pie, then, sure, why not?  If you just have to satisfy that Popeye's fix, go for it.  It's not designed to deprive.  It's designed so that you don't indulge in such pleasures often.  In other words, only eat it if you feel you're going to regret it later.

Another great thing about this experience is that I'll be doing it with my mom, which is the first time I've done Weight Watchers with a partner, so I think that will add another layer of accountability on top of the weekly group meetings.

So, this time, I'll actually keep everyone posted.

264 pounds today.  My first initial goal: 250 lbs.

Because The Big-O Said So...

So, I decided that I'm going to try a Vegan diet for 4 weeks, starting this Monday.  I say Monday because I have this weird thing about starting diets over the weekend.  And, come on, tomorrow's the Super Bowl.  I'm not giving up my mama's chili cheese dip.

And yes, I was influenced by Tuesday's episode of Oprah where she had her staff at Harpo do a Vegan diet for a week.  It seems like a pretty decent challenge that'll make me more cognizant of what I put in my body, and I'll probably lose a bit of this weight in the process.  However this is going to mean no animal products at all for the next almost month.  No Chick-Fil-A.  No Starbucks.  No Mac and Cheese.  No Blue Bell Caramel Turtle Cheesecake Ice Cream...

Oh, f*** this s***.

OK, I'm just kidding.  I can do this.  Granted that on day 29, I'll probably celebrate having the willpower to stay on a Vegan diet for a month by running to the nearest Houston's and ordering a Hawaiian Ribeye with a loaded baked potato with extra butter (Hey, I never said this would be a long-term thing), I think this will be a good experience that'll help me make better decisions about eating.

This being said, today I did some "starter" shopping for this whole Vegan thing at Whole Foods today.  I don't think I've ever in my life spent more time in a grocery store than I did today.  But it was interesting sifting through aisles and sections of stuff, looking for that little "V" on the label or just using my common sense.  I seriously stood in the middle of an aisle debating whether or not pure maple syrup was Vegan or not.  I decided that it was, because it comes from trees, but then after all that, I forewent the syrup because then I had to ask myself "is there a Vegan way to make pancakes?"  Then I was like, "not if you want them to taste good".  I'm pretty sure there will be more of this inner turmoil in the aisles...

Being a guy, one thing I'm concerned about is this whole soy thing.  You may have heard that soy somehow increases estrogen levels, therefore rendering us guys slightly physically emasculated.  I bought some tofu, some "ground beef-like" crumbles, and some Tofurky for sandwiches.  So, will I be fine, or should I just go ahead and buy some Man Spanx?

Coming up: My first day as a Vegan on Monday.

Allow me to introduce myself...

"How did I let this happen again?"

-Oprah Winfrey 

Hey everyone.  Thanks for reading my very first entry in my blog, "Tres. On a Diet. Again."

My name is Tres.  I guess you already knew that.  I weigh 262.5 pounds.  I'm much, much unhappy about that.  This means I am only about 19 pounds shy of my weight at it's biggest 7 years ago of 281 pounds.  I subsequently lost about 70 pounds over the next year by diligently sticking to Weight Watchers and managed to keep it off all through high school, and was on cloud nine about it.  Hell, I was so happy about it, I even devoted a whole article about it in the teen newspaper I was involved with at the time.  (Body-image issues was, and still is, a hot-button issue with teens, in my opinion.)  I was so elated that day I was in the Express at Perimeter Mall and tried on a pair of size-34 jeans that I actually shelled out the $60 for them that day, just because.  I was that happy.  I was finally not-fat.  I felt in control of myself.

Then there was college.  And all-you-can-eat dining halls.  Then the freshman fifteen came.  Then the stress of keeping my social life in balance not to mention classes getting harder.  So, then the sophomore sixteen came, and so on.  Suffice it say, college took it's toll on my body.  I think one of the reasons I've battled with my weight so much, especially during college, is because I also found myself battling some inner demons.  And unfortunately, food became my friend, comfort, and even slight addiction.


So, what made me want to write a blog about my battles with the bulge?

Well, I can say that that movie Julie and Julia and hearing Oprah talk about her weight influenced me some.   For some reason, I've always had this knack for using cyberspace as a sounding board for my feelings.  Plus by giving a daily account on how this whole journey is going, I can hold myself a little more accountable for my actions, because I'm requiring myself to air this whole thing out.  Oprah (who you'll probably hear me make reference to a lot because her situation mirrors mine in a lot of ways) said that she doesn't necessarily have a "weight problem", but that she has a "self-care problem that manifests through weight".  I think that's what I have.  I need to take better care of myself.  I need to stop using food as solace, a solution for whatever boredom, or loneliness, or dissatisfaction I'm feeling about my life.  In essence, those feelings, just like the way I deal with them, are only temporary.  If I can take control of my feelings, I can take control of this weight.  I mean, that piece of Popeye's isn't going to make whatever it is I'm feeling at that time go away.

I actually look forward to this whole thing.  I'm sure there will be some trials and tribulations, like pizza night, but hey, it's all good.

So, here's to a happier, healthier, and in-better-shape me.